It’s back. But this time is different. I’m still acutely aware of the power of this great wild giant, but it isn’t after me.

We find a place on the floor, and it rubs its body along the length of mine. I’m careful to avoid its massive claws, but know that any injury would be accidental – that’s unique this time.

I get up to look around the place, thinking the bear will follow after me. I may be upsetting our delicate balance. But before long, I hear snoring. The giant, wild bear is fast asleep. Content and asleep.

I wake up to my partner snoring beside me and I am flooded with awareness.

In my previous dreams of the bear, I was always afraid that it was going to hurt me or kill me. It never did, but it was either holding me down or trying to break into where I was hiding – it was terrifying. Now, I know it was me, this powerful part of me that I was afraid of. I was afraid to trust it, afraid to get hurt.

And the people in my dreams never helped but instead watched as the bear held me down. They did nothing. I was having an internal struggle with my bear, and they didn’t see the bear. They just saw me. People have recognized this power in me long before I have.

When I told my truth, they believed me. Not because they knew the truth, not because others had spoken their truth. They could hear the power rising up in my voice. They could hear me roar.

I choose vulnerability over paralyzing fear… which border on the same line. That is brave. I am not powerless, I am brave.

I am the bear. The bear is me.

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